GREAT TRUTHS AT EVERY AGE
What children have learned:
- When your Mom is mad, don't let her brush your hair.
- If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person.
- Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato (or an egg).
- You can't trust dogs to watch your food.
- Don't cut your own bangs.
- Never try to give a cat a bath.
- You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk.
- Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts.
- The best place to be when you're sad is Grandma's lap.
What adults have learned:
- Raising teenagers is like nailing Jello to a tree.
- Wrinkles don't hurt.
- Families are like fudge, mostly sweet, with a few nuts.
- Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground.
- Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside.
- Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy.
And as you grow old, you learn:
- Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.
- You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster.
- It's frustrating when you know all the answers but nobody bothers to ask you the questions.
- Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.
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The Scott Loper Team
Scott & Lisa Loper